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Closure!


What does it mean to not feel anything? To numb the pain that is caused because you felt too much? I have seen break ups in my life, and I have seen friends going through this torturous thing. But what I haven't realized is that, why people need answers to find closure in a relationship? Yes, granted that we have loved that special someone for one, maybe two, maybe more, years. And we expect that, that special someone actually cares about what we feel. But the truth is in a dying relationship, no one actually cares. I mean come on, if they did, why would it die in the first place??

So when we love we love completely...blah blah blah. But when things go wrong, like for instance, your boyfriend/girlfriend cheats on you...or when they act differently to a very crucial situation you are facing, it's taken that the relationship is going to the dogs. When the going gets bad, believe you me, the bad doesn't get going. It only gets worse. And when that happens we say the words, 'I want out', what happens?

We start reliving our perfect relationship, which is not so perfect now. I mean, hello, the relationship is over and then we think of things that went wrong!! Why couldn't we actually think of them when we were in a relationship?? Anyway, the point is, all these questions come into our head in our most shattered moment, like, what happened? why did he/she do this to me? I loved him/her so much, couldn't they see it? How did I let this happen to us? And so on and so forth. Then we go on a mission to know all the answers, when we already know that we are going to be more humiliated than ever. I mean EVER. Not even in our teenagers years when your supposedly pimply boyfriend kisses your best friend in front of the friends. who know you two are going around. OK. This may not be a perfect example of a 'humiliating situation'. But all of us in our life have one (at least) humiliating situation, which we cannot forget till date cause it was so horrible! Right? Yes! But going after an ex-lover to know the so called I-need-to-know-why-you-did-this kind of answers isn't going to help heal you from your heartbreak.

Given the heart is broken. Its delicate and it breaks. But what do we get out of chasing ex-lovers for answers to questions you already have? Closure? Huh, far from it. More heart ache is what I would say. It's like being a dog. When a dog gets hurt, he keeps licking and biting his wound, in a most disgusting sort of way. What does this do? Makes the wound worse. And if there is a care taker around he/she would take the poor wounded dog to a vet. But then, we don't always get a care taker or a vet to tend to our wounds, you know.

It's always better that, when we lose a battle and have battle wounds, we go sit quietly in some place. Or the other fabulous option is to go out and celebrate that you are single again! It's the best way to realise that you are worth more, and sitting and brooding about some a**h*** is not gonna make you feel any better. So I guess you can mourn for three days (OK! a weeks at tops) and then get back in the game. Life is just gonna pass you by if you sit around and wait for prince charming to realize what he has done and come begging for forgiveness. The only closure you can really have is that , the relationship has now ended! There, that's that. Deal with it. Its not the end of the world! Right? Even if it is, then why are you just sitting around wasting it? Go out there and get as many fish as you can!

Life can be a real b****, but that doesn't mean you give up on love and say that I need to find closure and mop the floor with tears! And the more you want to know why something like this happened, trust me you will find no answers. The only ones you find are those that make you feel worse. And who wants to feel worse? Life is meant to lived like there is no tomorrow (or in my case, no Monday :( ) So for those of you who are really mopping the floor with your tears or filling your best friends ears with all your sob stories, I suggest you get off that arse and realise that you are too precious to be bogged down by a lousy guy/gal who doesn't have the guts to fight for the love of their lives! If they don't know what they are missing, then how would you be happy anyway? Its not worth it, if you ask me.

Closure...the only thing close to that is knowing that you are worth more than what you have bargained for in the relationship you were in. So there you go, closure is achieved by letting go of all the negative feelings, negative energy, and negative people! Hallelujah! Get up and smell the roses, feel blessed that you even exist, thank your friends who listened to you endlessly whine about how he/she did this to you. Be grateful for everything, and then you will see how you finally get your closure!!

Comments

Naveen Yadav said…
Very good article on closure.. I just wanna add one more thing... Life is too Precious a thing to whine about someone or something.."Every Min in our life is like an icekle the min it falls on u r hand it melts away " realize this.. I know all the yadi yada advice..n crap.. bt its u r life.. if something is hurting try to get out it one way or the other.. Just cryin or sobing over past is not gonna get u anything.. like the sayin "Past is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery and Today is a GIFT that is y we call it the PRESENT" Enjoy the present there is a new one waiting for u everyday :). Live life to the Full n Keep Smiling :).

NavYav
Unknown said…
Thnks sweety...I agree with u. there is always something new and exciting around the bend...I mean how wud we have met otherwise?? :P

If not for Ridhi's accident we wudnt have met and become friends. We wud have still been strangers :)
Unknown said…
This comment has been removed by the author.

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