You try and try, but it sticks like glue. Sometimes we wonder why we cannot let go of things, situations or people, who do not make us happy. The more we avoid them, the more it seems to bother us. Why does this happen? We go through life hearing, seeing and feeling many emotions. They subconsciously effect the way we think. We don't realize this, but our brain is like a super computer. It picks up and stores information in the back of our mind. It could be something we heard. It could be something we felt very briefly when someone shouts at us. But it none the less gets stored. We harbour these subconscious memories and react to them in moments that catch us unaware.
Many of us have at some point felt pain. Immense pain, that could bring negative thoughts into our minds. Like, 'I am not good enough', 'I am not beautiful', 'I am not capable', etc. You may say that you don't think that way. But in a situation you were badly hurt, a negative thought like the ones mentioned above or even worse thoughts could get deeply implanted in your sub conscience. Your waking conscience is not aware of this. But every time you feel sad or hurt, this implanted thought comes to the forefront and makes you feel even more miserable about yourself. The result? Self hatred or projected animosity to others around you.
When we avoid a painful situation and try not to think about it, the feelings felt which were embedded in our sub conscience, make us feel irritable and negative about things that are yet to happen. What happened in your past, could and will effect your present and your future. But the lesser known fact is, how you look at your present and future can also change your past. Confused? Let me explain.
Lets take a very common example. A girl falls deeply in love with a boy. They make promises of sharing their lives together, they have dreams and they make plans. Suddenly the girl finds out that the boy is cheating on her or he is lying to her or is a bad person. The immediate outcome is a big fight and a painful breakup. The emotional torment the girl goes through, makes her form opinions about people, or situations in life. After sometime, the girl can have trust issues with the opposite sex. She may become unhappy thinking that whom ever she will be with next may also hurt her. Or even worse, she may stop believing in love!
Her present and future are effected by what happened in her past. But if she could just calmly analyze her past and see what went wrong, she would not only understand why the boy hurt her, but she could also learn valuable lessons about herself. Past events if calmly analyzed and understood only makes one stronger and wiser. But never weak or venerable. So by letting go of anger, hurt, vengeance, etc, we are not only becoming better people, we can have our happiness back and a better future too!
Our happiness, our lives, are in the decisions we make. If we choose to stay positive, no matter how adverse the situation might be, we will definitely be happy. Letting go is tough. It takes time and patience. But its not impossible. Harbouring negative emotions not only effects our mental health but also our physical well being. Headaches are a common manifestation of an emotionally driven physical ailment. Diseases like cancer are also caused by negative emotional state of our minds.
Think about - We could just relax and analyze our problems and let go of our unnecessary emotional baggage, or spend all our life savings on hospitals and medical checkups. Love yourself. Know that at the end of the day, we are answerable only to ourselves. We should be at the top in our list of priorities in our life. Nobody is as important as you are to yourself. So just let go and see the magic unfold!
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